I have stolen candy from the grocery store.
I have ignored people I know when I see them in public.
I have avoided situations that scared me.
I have judged others for having negative qualities - that I also have.
I have spent money that I couldn't afford to spend.
I have hurt those that I care about.
And I am still worthy of respect and esteem. Self-respect and Self-esteem that is.
Too often we humans heap loads of shame on ourselves for the mistakes we've made.
Negative self-judgment comes quickly due to the weaknesses or poor qualities you see in yourself.
As if those mistakes and weaknesses disqualify you from holding any value; a depletion of dignity.
Dignity is defined as the quality of being worthy of esteem or respect. Every human is worthy of this, no matter what. Your Inner Critic will prevent you from believing this.
Every human is carrying emotional scars from emotional injuries. That is why "hurt people hurt people" (I don't know who first said that). It is also why "all behavior makes sense" (my sister told me that). Those injuries can cause you to behave in ways that are self-destructing.
I imagine you could also come up with a list of acts that you aren't proud of, like I did above.
Can you also consider believing that you are still worthy, valuable, and loved?
If you came across someone who'd been injured, would you shame them for being hurt? Would you walk away and ignore them? Or would you show them a degree of compassion?
Those with a persistent inner critic often find it easier to attend to others' injuries.
Are you willing to offer yourself the same compassion and grace that you would give to the injured?
In the moments when your injuries are most apparent, will you be your own Good Samaritan?
Pour oil on your wounds in the form of kind self-talk.
Carry yourself to safety by way of adequate sleep, nutrition and exercise.
Surround yourself with those who care about you.
I want to clarify: Self-love is not a journey you take alone. You were never meant to handle everything by yourself.
Self-love is recognizing you have value no matter what your past looks like. No matter what other's have told you. No matter what you're capable of.
No. Matter. What.
Xo,
Meredith
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