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Commitment vs. Overcommitment

To be Committed is to be dedicated: Taking your grandpa to his radiation treatments, on time, every week.

To be Overcommitted is to be overzealous: Not allowing anyone else to take him, even when they've offered and it would benefit you to use that time for some self-care.

To be Committed is to be faithful: Staying with your healthy eating plan when attending a party that has a table full of sweets.

To be Overcommitted is to be fanatical: Informing everyone at the party about the dangers of sugar and how much their hurting themselves by indulging in the sweets.

To be Committed is to be wholehearted: Like creating a fundraiser for a good cause and genuinely contributing your time and talents to reach your goals.

To be Overcommitted is to overextend: Using every spare minute, dollar, breath, thought and action toward making the fundraiser not only profitable, but perfect.

Overcommitting is "allocating more resources than are actually available." (from PowerThesaurus)

Commitment can easily become Overcommitment if we believe messages that say more is better.

That nothing but perfection is good enough. That what's important to us should be important to all.

That we're only acceptable, likable - even lovable - when we give everything we have, and then some, to what we're doing.

Often, those messages come from within.

The beliefs you hold about yourself and what it means about you to serve, to be responsible, and fulfill your duties will affect how willingly you commit to things. Your need for validation and to control outcomes will affect how you show up to those commitments.

Actually knowing and honoring what motivates you to make commitments, and how obligated you feel toward the opportunity to give, will prevent you from over committing.

Because overcommitting brings frustration and resentment, overwhelm and burnout. It doesn't tend to bring what you really want - Contentment. Fulfillment. Enjoyment.

Contentment is the ability to sit with discomfort. It's the ability to want something and not get it.

Contentment is found in abundance; not having it all - but being satisfied with what you have and knowing you can get more of what you need when the time comes.

Will you consider these Commitments -

Will you commit to having a hard conversation? Commit to saying "no" when the opportunity doesn't feel like a yes?

Will you commit to accepting who you are and where you are, even if you ultimately want something different in the future?

Will you commit to the effort it's going to take and the grace and compassion that will be needed along the way?

Committing to those things will greatly reduce your tendency to overcommit and Contentment will naturally follow.



P.S. Consider getting an Obligation Audit to help you evaluate what your sense of duty is actually creating for you - check it out HERE.

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